A year ago this week I found out I was pregnant with my sweet Joshua. I have never been so shocked by any news in my life. I flew to Arizona with this secret in my heart. I spent the weekend with family and loved every minute of thinking of my sweet baby growing. I knew the baby was big because I felt him moving moving all over the place. Little did I know I would be 24 weeks along with a beautiful boy. What a miracle for a girl who wasn't supposed to have any more children. What a tragedy that he would be whisked from our arms to heavens door. He is still part of our family I adore him and miss him being a part of me. I would love to have him here today, but as I tell my son often "it was not his plan".
I have painful arms today. I have longed for another baby for a while and even more so when I lost Joshua but today my arms ache with the loss of my darling son. Maybe another miracle can happen. I do not know. One can only hope and pray for a great miracle. It truly would be miraculous. Like I have always said. "I believe in miracles I have seen them happen before. Maybe it is our families turn for a miracle.