Today

Today I am grateful for family and the wonderful blog world I have leaned on since the loss of my son.  I have never been good at expressing myself in words and so I read others words and find my feelings and my thoughts expressed so eloquently by others.  I find my feelings are in the normal realm as I read others.  There are a few women who have taught me much about life, loss, grief, and joy.  There are very few people who read this blog or comment ever but I write it for me.  I am going to post a few pictures from Joshua's happy day.  IT was happy we had a great first birthday.

Rachel's first R she has ever written.  I thought it was appropriate for her baby brother Joshua!

We started with a balloon release on Sunday with our families and my  husband so he could participate as he was hiking with the scouts on Joshua birthday:

We then went to eat at a drive in because I craved Fresh Strawberry/banana shakes when I was pregnant with Joshua.  (the only child I have had cravings with).  This was the first time I have had sugar in 6 months and it tasted great!

 

We hatched butterflies for three weeks before his birthday and had so much fun with their habitat and taking care of them.  It was fun and sad to release them for Joshua.  As you can see my 3 year old was fascinated with them.  They are beautiful and so much fun during such a difficult time for me.  The night we released them was beautiful and the sunset was so pink and purple and blue.  We had a great night meeting Derrek at the same time on his hike.  

My lamb filled with flowers and a one for my son.

Finally I took some shots with Joshua's hand and foot molds with a picture of the Savior.  The only place where true peace and happiness comes.